Forgotten Memoirs
by signifytheworld
Summary: Because life is what it is and there are things that can be learned. Konoha Eleven didn't know it until it punched them in the stomach. Based on the oh-so-infamous chap614. (Neji-centric)
1. Chapter 1

**Forgotten Memoirs**

**...**

_When he beats his bars and he would be free; it is not a carol of joy or glee, but a prayer he sends from his heart's deep core, but a plea, that upward to Heaven he flings-_

_I know why the caged bird sings!_

**…**

[1]

Neji was one frightening man, he could say that much. While the Hyuuga was shorter and most definitely not bulkier than he, Chouji understood he had little to no chance against the Byakugan-wielding genius. After all, Neji was called a _genius._

Still, despite his fear of the straitlaced man and his seemingly apathetic manner towards everything, Neji was a precious _nakama_. And because he was, Chouji wanted to abet him in his time of need- even though the Hyuuga didn't really need it and would probably end up saving Chouji instead. However, the offer still stood - unspoken and unneeded.

Until that moment.

Hyuuga Neji, known for his cold demeanor and intimidating expression, ran to his own demise for the sake of _nakama. _Even Chouji knew, at that point, there was no saving Hyuuga Neji. There was no saving the man who taught him humility. Chouji despaired because he could never show Neji how much his _nakama _meant to him, and he could never make up for the times he had never gotten to know him better.

Chouji promised himself, clenching his fists until his coarse knuckles paled, he would _never_ lose another precious _nakama_ without going first.

…

[2]

To be honest, Shikamaru never really knew Neji. He had his own team, and Neji had his; there was really no need for talk when they didn't need it. The few times they did talk included missions that needed both their expertise and even then, meaningless chatter wasn't for either of them.

That didn't mean they didn't understand each other, though. They say men have a way of talking without actually using their lips. Both brunettes acknowledged that, using raised eyebrows and narrowing eyes to convey their feelings. It was something they had; it was nothing like the endless chatter between Ino and Sakura, or the bickering between Naruto and Sasuke. It was special because it was silent and concise.

Likewise, they both knew the dirty undersides of clan politics, and although Neji would never have become a clan head like he, Shikamaru knew Neji understood his unforeseen woes. Men like them- their future was all planned, laid out on a silver platter whether they wanted it or not. Shikamaru never fought it, and Neji never fought it, despite how unwilling he seemed. Shikamaru thought he and Neji would always be in the same position- going with the rushing wave that carried them for long days and nights. But for once, Shikamaru had thought wrong. Neji had chosen his own future, no matter the consequences that lay before him.

And Shikamaru briefly wondered if he could fight against the billowing seas too.

…

[3]

Shino was easily disregarded; he knew that. After all, he was the only one uninvited (besides Lee, but even he was able to join them shortly afterwards) along the Sasuke Retrieval Mission. However, this trait of his had allowed him to make many correct inferences regarding the personalities and skill levels of many.

When he first laid eyes on the Hyuuga, he knew that his physical and mental prowess was incomparable. Neji, as Shino would later learn, was proclaimed a once-in-a-century prodigy by both the Hyuuga branch and main house members, which was quite the accomplishment since branch members were always considered quite poor in comparison to the politically powerful main house members.

Even two years later, Neji had always exceeded expectations. He was on the verge of becoming an ANBU and rumors roamed Konoha or his succession to the Hyuuga clan, despite the fact he was a branch member. It seemed success followed Neji wherever he went. Ironic to his lowly birthright, it seemed Neji was destined for triumph rather than failure.

And while he was never close to Neji, he felt for him as his bright future fell apart. However, it seemed the Hyuuga genius had chosen his fate and while Shino was a sympathizer, he could feel no pity for a man with the freedom to choose.

He thought that is what Neji would have wanted anyways.

…

[4]

She actually couldn't recall a moment when she interacted with Neji properly. Sure, they had barbeques together, but then again, they were barbeques as a _group. _Ino could've been paying attention to him, but she had other matters to attend to- such as keeping Chouji from hogging all the meat and forcing Shikamaru to eat. Neji was busy too, as he had the ever-youthful Lee on his team.

Ino twitched, because she knew they were all excuses. They remained excuses because she _knew_ she could have gotten to know him before his passing and she _knew_ she could have spent more time with her father before his. He had done so much for her, but she was so engulfed by the latest things, so obsessed with frivolities, that she wasn't able to love the people she knew properly. And while Ino was quite the carefree butterfly (easy to do and easy to forget), the consequences of her choices suddenly poured on her like rain, weighing down her elegant wings.

Still, she didn't have time to recover from her loss. Either way, she'd have to face her hopeful mother with news that would leave her utterly heartbroken- just like she had to remember Konoha Eleven was just Konoha Ten now.

Ino idly wondered if time could turn back so she wouldn't have to make so many excuses.

…

[5]

Kiba was, in all aspects, a dog. Not like he'd admit it aloud, or agree to any statement similar to it, but he _was_ part of the Inuzuka clan, which was most closely affiliated with dogs, after all.

Dogs were fiercely loyal, aggressive, and most of all, incredibly headstrong. Kiba was all three and _more._ He was proud of himself and prouder of his friends. Without his friends, he knew he would not be the _man_ he was today.

Although Neji was never a huge part of his life, Neji was still Kiba's friend. And Kiba was loyal to his friends first and foremost.

So when he witnessed the ten-tails' spears pierce through Neji's pliable body, anger pierced through his. Kiba couldn't fathom that one so close to him could have perished so soon. All of him was shaking in fury, itching to battle the man who _dared _to lay a hand on his friend. He was about to go, too. He was going to die another sacrifice for a war bred by _hate._

But he couldn't.

He tilted his head towards the sky, and quieted the rage that blazed inside him. It was such a Naruto thing, he offhandedly thought, assuring Akamaru's concerned whimpers. How could he accuse a hateful man of bad things when he was full of hate himself?

Even though Neji's gruesome death ached his heart, Kiba knew that if he died avenging Neji, he would die for _hatred_.

And if anything, Kiba would rather die with good intentions in his heart than to die with hatred.

…

[6]

Sakura had seen Neji at his worst. Everyone in Konoha had. Neji had droned on and on about the rules and regulations of fate and predestination, but no one dared to refute him because of his uncanny strength. Everyone, but Naruto.

Naruto wanted to be Hokage while he was still hated in his village. He couldn't afford to believe in locked paths if he pursued his dream. No one saw that but Naruto. Still, Naruto _made_ Neji see that there were so many possibilities, so many roads to walk. Neji relinquished destiny, and accepted hope with open arms.

Then, Sakura had seen Neji at his best, exceeding expectations and showing a friendlier exterior than the last. Sakura had truly believed that Neji could surpass most anyone; he completed missions with flying colors and Tsunade-sama, who never praised anyone openly, told Sakura that Neji was one to look out for.

So how could Hyuuga Neji, genius of the prestigious Hyuuga, fall? He was strong; he had a _future_. Sakura couldn't believe such a man could fall before her very eyes. And if Hyuuga Neji fell, couldn't Naruto as well?

Questions plagued Sakura's doubtful mind and she realized she had never felt so utterly _hopeless_ in her life. Not when she was a genin, not when she watched Naruto turn into the Kyuubi- never.

But she looked to Naruto, and realized that if his friends didn't get back up on their feet, he wouldn't either. So she shed her insecurities to give Naruto his willpower. She couldn't be _hopeless_ when there were so many people counting on the victory of this war.

Besides, she was practically raised the Godaime's daughter; she lived to make her village proud.

**…**

_- Sympathy (Paul Lawrence Dumbar)_

**...**

**I may have been gone for a while. OKAYOKAY, a long while. Things have been sort of frantic and deafening and not really what they were supposed to be. I know that's no excuse, but it is what it is.**

**So as an (angsty) apology, I cranked out this twoshot (which the second installment will be on its way) because ijustreallyneedtogrieveforNeji. I know it happened like a hundred bazillion gazillion years ago, but it's something I needed to make things right. So here you go, and I hope you enjoi(:**


	2. Chapter 2

**Forgotten Memoirs**

…

When he beats his bars and he would be free; it is not a carol of joy or glee, but a prayer he sends from his heart's deep core, but a plea, that upward to Heaven he flings-

I know why the caged bird sings!

…

[7]

He cradled Neji's limp figure in his arms, and slid a thumb across his naked forehead. The cursed mark that once donned the Hyuuga had faded away along with his life, leaving only a body and the memories behind.

It couldn't be, right? He could not, would not, _did not_ lose Neji. Neji was strong; he was the Hyuuga's genius, for god's sake! He fought for justice and loyalty, and did everything a good person should. A righteous hero could not lose- not when he did everything _right._

Still, Naruto knew; the proof was irrefutably there. The 17-year old's heart had ceased to beat, no chakra could be sensed, and the light-green tattoo disappeared. No lingering evidence of the Hyuuga's life had been left- only the staining blood of his fatality.

Naruto pledged to save the village, to be their greatest protector. He _promised_ he wouldn't let any of his friends go- yet, here lay Neji, the man whose life was now his own. He clutched at Neji's dead body unconsciously.

Naruto could only faintly comprehend he was in the middle of the war because of his overwhelming grief. He realized he didn't have time to mourn over his comrade's death and tt _hurt_ knowing that Neji wouldn't get the burial he deserved. How could he fight if he couldn't save one friend?

He vaguely felt Hinata's hand strike his tan cheek and it was enough to remind him of the people who believed in his victory, of the people who he already held in his heart. There were so many, he grasped. Chiyo-baachan, Ero-sannin, the Sandaime, Nagato, Okaa-san, Otou-san...

And Neji. They all left their dreams and aspirations with him, and it was Naruto's job to protect them. His life was no longer just his. He laid Neji down gently upon the dirt floor and stood.

After all, if he couldn't fight for his friends, how could he deserve the title of Hokage?

…

[8]

Lee always had his eyes on Neji. After all, as a genius of hard work, he wanted to surpass a true genius. When he learned Hyuuga Neji was going to be on his team, Lee was ecstatic. He was going to have a chance to challenge a true genius every day! So thereon out, Lee made it a personal goal to beat the Hyuuga using his specialty- taijutsu.

After all, he couldn't become a great ninja using only taijutsu if he couldn't beat a genuine intellect.

So Lee trained until his muscles were aching and he couldn't walk any further. He sometimes had to wait until somebody came across his sore body and carried him home. He worked so very hard. His teammate had not yet acknowledged him, but Lee was determined to show him that he too could be a great ninja.

Still, Neji never laid his eyes upon the bowl-cut taijutsu master, and even someone as unwavering as Lee could become discouraged when he could not achieve what he wanted. The bushy-browed individual still practiced just as hard, hoping that someday, his adversary may recognize him as worthy.

That's why Lee was so happy when Neji finally acknowledged his skills, although indirectly. It was after the chunnin exams, and the Hyuuga was still healing from his brawl with Naruto. However, he knew Neji well enough to understand what his words meant.

Lee sparred with Neji more often after that, familiarizing himself with the Byakugan and he was extremely content with the way things were. Even though no one won and no one lost, Lee felt like he had finally connected with Neji. They say youthful men understand each other just through the clashing of fists, and Lee knew that he understood Neji just as well as Neji understood him.

That's why, even though he was shocked, he understood why Neji did what he did. Neji loved his home, his team, Hinata-sama, and Naruto-kun too much to let them go.

And he had never respected his eternal rival so much as he did now.

…

[9]

Her team specialized. That's what they did. They were adequate enough in all areas to be considered good ninja, but it was their exclusive traits that made them great. She was exceptional in long-range combat, and Lee was a taijutsu master and a natural at the drunken fist. Gai-sensei was phenomenal in his taijutsu, and officially dubbed the "Green Beast of Konoha." But Neji?

Neji was _remarkable_ in every area, although he specialized in close-range combat. He was the first of Konoha 11 to be promoted to _jounin_, and received multitudes of praise about his proclivity to succeed. Neji was a _great_ ninja destined to do things that were larger than him. So Ten-Ten never understood why the world did what it did to a _great_ ninja like Neji.

She didn't really see it happen, and to be truthful, she never wanted to. She didn't believe she could handle seeing a comrade die. Of course, she and her friends were ninja, so she knew it was inevitable. Not to mention that they were in the middle of a _war_ and death lay all around them. But for her, death had never seemed so _real_.

She remembered Neji had been cold and disdainful at first, brushing her aside as a fading blimp on his map. Something always tugged painfully at her heart, but she didn't let it bother her because it was his nature. Then he started to become _warm_; a humbling aura replaced the once hostile atmosphere that surrounded him. Pleasantries substituted the tension that lay between the teammates when Neji was still cold.

In time, he became her closest friend and most personal confidant, even more so than Lee, who always encouraged Ten-Ten to do her best in everything she did. Ten-Ten _loved_ Neji. She _loved_ him like she _loved_ Lee, because they had believed in her dexterity more than anyone ever had.

Neji was special to her in a way she couldn't define. He was her teammate, her sparring partner, her friend, her adherent, and if fate had taken the road far less taken, her lover.

Her eyes drifted to his lifeless body, and tears spilled for a future she could never discover.

…

[10]

To her, Neji-niisan had never been the bad guy. Never ever, ever. Even when he treated Hinata more hostile than most, she didn't care because she _understood _him. Neji-niisan was strong, willful, confident, and above all, _compassionate._ To strangers, he was shrouded in mystery and impossible to touch, no matter how much one tried to reach for him, he danced just out of their grasp. However, those who _did _know Neji-niisan intimately could distinguish that underneath the layers of mild conceit, a somber disposition, and a seemingly natural ability to remove his enemies swiftly and without hesitation, was a young man who genuinely _cared. _

His hatred for the Hyuuga main family and especially Hinata during his earlier days stated otherwise, but like she said- Hinata _knew_ him, before and after, inside and out.

However, the one thing she didn't know about Neji-niisan, is that he would be willing to save her from her ruin. He leaped in front of her without a sliver of indecision, when it was her- it was _supposed _to be her- that would die a martyr for the village and more importantly, the man she loved.

If anything, she wished for the happiness of the man she had loved so truly. Of course, it would be better if it were she who could stand by his side, but she figured- if she couldn't be with Naruto, she would gladly give up her affections so that he could be happy. Hinata understood, from years of analysis of her own character, that her mind and her heart were selfless in nature. Her essence was unchangeable and she found that her joy had been in giving and never expecting. That's why offering her life a _second _time for her beloved was befitting for Hinata's love and her heart.

What she _didn't _know, is that her selflessness would turn to selfishness.

She never knew that Neji-niisan would die because of her, and she never knew Neji-niisan would die _for _her.

And all the more often, a pang of guilt hit her heart whenever she thought of him, and the life that her dear Neji-niisan could have lived.

(But she didn't let it on because in a war, they had no time to grieve for the lost, but to commemorate them for their sacrifice.)

…

[11]

Neji had never really taken the time to mull over his death. Not that thinking about death was normal, but it was definitely something he preferred not to think about when he could be training to pass the next ANBU test, or even better- sleeping. Death to him seemed a million light years away, and if it ever did occur to him, he believed he would be aged and wrinkled on his bed, with his wife and children wishing him will in the next life- or something along those lines. But now that it's hit him hard, he has no choice but to think about what he's done- which indeed is kind of ironic, considering he's already dead.

First of all, he was stupid for thinking he would die on a deathbed with his wife next to him. After all, he was a shinobi, and there was no guarantee he would come home safely. He could pray and hope, but even that wasn't reassuring for a powerhouse like Naruto when things turn out for the worse. Second of all, he didn't really regret his actions. Although he would miss watching Hinata and his eccentric team grow to be one of the strongest in Konoha, he didn't dare hesitate when it came to protecting his cousin's life and the love of her being. Because somewhere in the back of his head, if he had doubts at all, he _knew _all that had changed him for the better would have been gone.

All that had changed, and would change, _the world_ for the better would be gone.

Neji just could _not _let that happen, because he loved his village, Lee, Gai-sensei, Ten-Ten, Hinata-sama, and even his clan too much to let things regress to the way it was.

That was reason enough for him to forfeit his life, if only for the people who had saved his soul from damnation. Even though Naruto's shocked expression brought pain to his head, and Hinata-sama's lovely face twisted in agony as the ten-tails' spears ripped through his body, he was able to say his final goodbyes with a serene smile.

So when God appeared to him in the afterlife, he was not afraid.

_Do you regret what you have done for your comrades?_

Neji shook his head, satisfied with the life he lived and his accomplishments.

_If I were able to, I would do it over again._

The gates opened, and a light so bright he had to cover his eyes engulfed his figure. Rubbing his unmarked forehead unconsciously, he took a step forwards and never turned back.

…

- Sympathy (Paul Lawrence Dumbar)

…

**So many feels right now. I thank you for your support for the short two-shot, and thanks for all the reviews(: Shout-out to Darth-Taisha (who probably won't even see this) because she is like the reigning ItaHina queen.**


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